No Fear – Walk Into the Future

The true anniversary date

anniversary image

(Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay)

“A year from now, you will wish you had started today”.

(Karen Lamb)

Dictionary.com defines an anniversary as the yearly recurrence of the date of a past event and the celebration or commemoration of such a date.

The first Walk into the Future article was posted on this site on 6/18/2018. The true anniversary date for me is 4/14/2018—let me explain why I say this.

I sat on the beach at St. George Island (SGI) on 4/14/2018 with the idea of deciding which direction I wanted to pursue moving forward. The Walk into the Future concept was not on my radar but needed the beach atmosphere to help with a huge decision.

So, I sat on the beach on this prophetic day with my beach towel, cooler of beer, reggae, pen, and paper to figure this thing called life out (Prince reference).

I have used the concept of a pros/cons list in the past to help with major decisions and my goal on this day was to identify pro/con items to inform the decision I needed to make. Dr. Henry Cloud identifies successful people do not hang on to bad stuff for long in his book 9 Things you Simply Must do in Love and Life. The only way to label something as bad is to take a true look at it without emotion, hence the pros/cons list for me.

I finally admitted I spent too much time determining if I should stay in my old role. The interactions I had with students, employers, faculty, staff, and community members still appealed to me but there was always something daily to eliminate my joy. Turns out it was too much negative workplace energy. This is not a complaint just a stated fact from my perspective—negative energy can and will wear you down over time.

Fast forward to the list and the decision was obvious! There were 5 pros and 15 cons. I tried to manufacture some additional pros just to see if I could even this process out a bit, but this was the final tally. The 15 cons were present EVERY day and only 3 pros were daily items. I was amused when I saw the disparity of my two lists. I subconsciously knew this to be true but never wrote it out to examine more in-depth. Sadly, none of the cons listed were fixable—not one.

I laughed when I was able to view the list for the insight in front of me. So, on 4/14/2018 the Walk into the Future journey began after I made the decision it was time to move on from what I was doing. The work and making a difference daily were not the problem it was the negative energy—the opposite of the Irie mindset I seek in life. Dr. Cloud has another principle he calls Pull the Tooth. I decided to pull the tooth and Walk into the Future after I finished my beer and listened to a few more Bob Marley songs.

I decided to write this post after looking in my journal and coming across the page with my pros/cons list. Just happened to be 2 years to the date I wrote the items and wanted to share with my readers I just had an anniversary.

So, happy anniversary to the Walk into the Future blog. Here is to a few more years of writing, sharing adventures and making a difference in the world. Thanks for walking with me!

What tooth do YOU need to pull? How could the pros/cons list help with your decision?

“The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing”.

(Walt Disney)

Why Black Lives Matter (BLM) matters today!

BLM

(Image by Markus Winkler from Pixabay)

“Human rights are something you were born with. Human rights are your God-given rights. Human rights are the rights recognized by all nations on earth. And any time anyone violates your human rights, you can take them to court”.

(Malcolm X.)

Dictionary.com defines human rights as a right that is believed to belong justifiably to every person.

Interesting to hear politicians, everyday Americans and TV news programs talk about the Constitution but most only cite the Amendments that fit a small segment of society. A lot of folks will scream for their Second Amendment rights even though it was written when the country did not have an Army and militias were needed to defend the country. These same folks do not make a peep when the Fourteenth Amendment is brought up.

14^th Amendment cliff notes version: No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person in its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

The Fourteenth amendment seems clearer to me in today’s climate than arming a militia we do not need because we have professional armed services (Army, Air Force, Coast Guard, Marine Corps, Navy, Guard and Reserves). Imagine if all Americans were treated equally as described in the Fourteenth amendment. The world would be a better place right now.

Had a fantastic conversation with an older gentleman last week about all the things (protests, marches, etc.) going on after the death of George Floyd. The gentleman is a retiree and he drives the customer shuttle part time for a local car dealership. He was giving me a ride home after I dropped my vehicle off for repairs and wanted to discuss current events. He let me know he wanted to talk with someone but did not know how to start. He asked if I would be willing to talk with him so he would have a better understanding of current events. Guess I made him feel comfortable because I had only been around him 10 minutes before he decided I was the chosen one to enlighten him.

He asked me two questions:

Why are people saying Black Lives Matter (BLM), shouldn’t all live matter?
Why are the confederate statues coming down so important today?

Explained to him the BLM movement is needed to highlight the injustices black people continue to face with no end in sight. No one ever said all lives do not matter but BLM is a way to focus on people who have been marginalized, forgotten, abused, and brutalized since being brought to America. The BLM movement keeps the continued injustices against black people in America at the forefront and signals we will not be quiet anymore. Anyone who says All Lives Matter, White Lives Matter or Blue Lives Matter have not been subjected to the same level of systemic racism, policing, sentencing, violence, government oversight and oppression as the people who need you to understand Black Live Matter!

https://blacklivesmatter.com/

I let my new friend know the confederate statues were routinely placed as racial dog whistles to a past that honored men who fought to continue slavery. Most people do not know but a lot of these statues were put in place throughout the 1900’s. The state of Arizona built a confederate monument in 2010. Let me repeat that—the state of Arizona commissioned and placed a confederate monument in 2010!!!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Confederate_monuments_and_memorials

Placing these monuments in public places is a slap in the face of all Americans but is reprehensible for anyone who was subjected to slavery, cruelty and death at the hands of the men others are trying to honor with a heritage claim. Does Germany or Japan have statues of American Generals who fought against their countries? What would they think having to walk by statues of these people daily?

The confederates who are depicted by the statues fought against America! They would be considered enemies if they were from a different country or race. They were traitors against the American government and fought to keep black people as slaves, but some people want to hide behind a heritage claim for why these statues should remain. They are a part of history but should not be given a higher regard than true American heroes who did not become traitors against their country. Confederate generals, soldiers, sympathizers, and apologists are traitors to the American way of life. Who would claim being a traitor as a heritage to be proud of?

My new friend and I departed after having a great conversation. I am happy he felt comfortable enough to want to talk with me. He let me know he would talk with his grand kids later that day to help them understand everything happening around them and become a better BLM ally. Smalls steps on this journey!

Who can you help understand the BLM movement? What support do you need to keep the conversation moving forward?

“It’s a privilege to educate yourself about racism instead of experiencing it”.

(Sir John)

Life is short—spend your ENERGY wisely!

Energy

(Image by Myriam Zilles from Pixabay)

“The energy of the mind is the essence of life”.

(Aristotle)

Dictionary.com defines energy as the strength and vitality required for sustained physical or mental activity.

Have you ever examined how much energy you invest in others? Are your energy investments being deposited in the correct places?

I ask these questions because I’ve had some interesting conversations with several close tree branches over the past couple weeks. I view my energy and time invested in others as valuable commodities. I’m mindful of how and when energy (time, thoughts, actions) will be invested to ensure I have the energy (time, thoughts, actions) for the right people.

Please note, I still envision myself as a People Builder but also understand energy can’t be expended equally to everyone. Finding the proper balance can be tricky but is necessary to ensure a proper life flow. This balance also provides the ability to move your energy focus and prioritize how and when you decide to expend energy.

I perform a yearly PURGE to ensure I concentrate my energy investments in the correct places.

So, on December 28, 2019 I went through my phone and LinkedIn contacts to identify contacts without mutual interactions within the past year. Mutual interactions can be defined as texts, networking requests, phone calls, simple conversations, etc. I took this action to remove potential clutter and reinforce why I have saved contacts in my phone and LinkedIn. These are the people who should get the energy investments mentioned earlier. I’m not on Facebook so no need for a PURGE on that platform.

Removing the miscellaneous (without a better word) contacts allows me to invest energy on the right people moving forward. Now, I don’t have to scroll through as many people to send out a text or LinkedIn message. This may seem like a small thing, but it reminds me of the importance of tree branches and why pruning is needed in life. It seems I always get a random text from someone in the PURGE a couple days after—it never fails. I don’t automatically add them back—I give them a test phase to see if they add energy to me—if not, they stay purged.

“Become more aware of what’s really worth your energy”.

(Pinterest pin, January 2020)

My example focuses on contacts in my phone and on LinkedIn. Don’t overlook the importance of the energy you expend on people in real life. I’m looking for people who display positive energy and are moving forward in life. Negative energy people can drain the life out of you and should be addressed or removed from your environment. Life is too short to continue to drag or tolerate negative energy on your Walk into the Future! Go ahead and have the tough conversations but make sure your time, thoughts and actions are focused on positive outcomes.

Get that #2020 vision you deserve!

How do you ensure your energy is invested in the correct places? Where can you adjust and ensure your energy is spent wisely?

“It’s a waste of energy to be angry with a man who behaves badly, just as it is to be angry with a car that won’t go”.

(Bertrand Russell)

Please note: this post was inspired by a conversation I had with one of my mentors who is 80+. She was able to apply my energy concept to her daily life and move forward in a specific situation where she was spending unnecessary energy. Life is funny, I’m providing mentorship to my mentors now. 😊 Irie!

Wormhole for Energy

(Image by Genty from Pixabay)

Guest Blogger Friday: Melissa Forges

Guest Blogger Friday Villages

(Image by Magdalena Smolnicka from Pixabay)

Today my guest blogger is Melissa Forges who is one of my closest tree branches. Melissa will be featured here for Guest Blogger Friday:

Villages: A success factor

When you think about the factors that have helped you become successful, which one stands out?

For me it’s my villages. My personal villages always come to mind because it’s through the support, resources, and encouragement I continuously receive, that enable me to thrive in the many areas of my life. I strongly believe a community has the power to cheerlead you to persevere and be the candor, the frank wisdom you need to be guided in a specific direction. A group of people, whether you call it a village, or another name can be a success factor in your career and life as you Walk into the Future with others by your side.

As the old proverb says, “It takes a village to raise a child”, so if child rearing, a noble yet daunting responsibility requires additional input and involvement, how much so for career, relationships, and other complex areas in our lives as well. The good news is there’s no boundary on what topic a village can be created around, how many villages you can be a part of, how many people in the village or how long it needs to last (it may serve for a specific purpose or time frame). The one ingredient is all must share the core identification of the group.

My villages are casual mom-groups to professional development organizations – and everything in between.

I’m part of a text-chat group with a handful of former coworkers and friends where we send jokes, encouragement, and levity during hectic work weeks. Another village is one that’s online via Facebook with 11,000+ members to provide networking opportunities, idea sharing and a safe space to feel heard and represented in our chosen career field.

Although I treasure all my villages as they are all unique, I appreciate one at work where we meet periodically throughout the day, especially at the end of the day to “check-in”, give feedback and provide advisement for each other’s projects and challenges, like a village think tank. The sincere support and sisterhood help each of us to shine, and I find that uplifting.

As one village makes me shine, another makes me sweat! This group of hard-working women are as diverse as they come but we all meet up three times a week, keep each other accountable and inspire one another to attain our fitness goals. I’ll never forget when we were tasked to plank for three sets of 60 seconds after an intense workout. Seems easy right? Well, not for me at that time! My arms were shaking from fatigue, sweat was dripping, and I was about to throw the towel in – but my village was not about to let that happen. Everyone began shouting my name and for me to not give up. I didn’t realize I needed a boost, but I sure used their energy and felt determined and was able to complete the exercise enthusiastically. The village helped me achieve the plank goal, shaky arms and all. It wasn’t about the planks; it was the group that helped me stay focused to achieve more than I thought I could in the moment.

That’s what villages can do. They call you higher to exist above mediocrity; they provide insight you may need for a decision or help you stay on your toes so to speak. Also, as villages call you higher, they become clusters of family whether they’re in-person or virtual because at the base of a village are the people, you’re building relationships with.

You may be in several villages and didn’t even know it. Think about the groups you periodically interact with and how you mutually serve one another. If you cannot think of one, maybe you can create one and it can even be online. Start with an interest or skill you enjoy or would like to develop. For example, it can be sports, business, or a hobby. You’ll find there are people, village people (pun intended) out there just like you looking to make a connection. Get out there and “raise a child”, metaphorically speaking, and build villages to incorporate into your success factor for life, career, and beyond!

What village(s) are you a part of? How has your village helped your success? If you’re not a part of a village, what type of village can you create?

Thank you Melissa for your outstanding insight on villages!

Follow Melissa here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mforges/

Don’t fear the unknown–life moves forward

full frame shot of text on wood — Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

“On the other side of your maximum fear are all the best things in life”.

(Will Smith)

How many times have you talked yourself out of doing something based on perceived fears? I’m talking about larger life episodes like changing careers, starting your own business, learning a new skill or traveling to an exotic locale.

Sometimes we fear the unknown simply because it is unknown. Nothing has happened to instill the fear we live with; we just bring it along into our daily routines. Don’t let that little voice in your head talk you out of pursuing something you want to accomplish. Positive thoughts generate positive outcomes! Tackle life with an Irie mindset!

Look for ways to embrace your fear and understand the root cause. Challenges provide opportunities to grow so don’t let a little apprehension stop you from making a move. Try to place a marker or name on what you fear. Is it the actual change, lack of confidence, professional requirements or something else? Understanding the root cause of fear provides a road map to help overcome the thing you fear—sounds simple, right?

Look for ways to visualize the successful outcome you seek. Leverage a vision mapping process to walk you through the entire process. Start with the most basic concepts and then work to put everything into a step-by-step diagram as a road map for success. Your vision map may show holes in your thought and execution patterns you can counter to help eliminate fear and enable success. The vision map also allows you to put time frames in-place to accomplish the task you identify.

Positive people make positive things happen! I continue to stress having an Irie mindset. Believe this is vital daily in life. Expect great things to happen and back up the expectations with proactive research, conversations and efforts needed to get what you want. Positive thoughts will help build up resiliency so when faced with obstacles you go to the next option but never stop trying to get what you want.

Be prepared to pivot as needed. There are times a fundamental change in approach is needed to get what you want. This is not a failure but a proactive way to work towards outcomes to enhance your current situation. Do you need to get a specific certification prior to starting a career change? Do you need to have a business partner to make your small business idea successful? The willingness to pivot when needed can eliminate a level of fear associated with similar changes.

“Staying positive does not mean that things will turn out okay. Rather it is knowing that you will be okay no matter how things turn out”.

(Unknown)

Accept fear as a natural motivator in life. Sounds counterproductive but what if you tackle a small fear daily to build up confidence for the larger things in life? Fear public speaking? Then join Toast Masters to get in front of people to learn how to overcome this fear. I’m a natural introvert so speaking in front of people was a fear I had. Discovered the more I speak in front of groups the less fear I have. The process becomes easier the more I face the fear.

Mentors can help you when facing your fears. We should all have multiple mentors to help get through personal and professional scenarios. Why not enlist a mentor when you must face a fear? This trusted advisor may have experience in the area and can provide insight to help you move forward. The mentor can also serve as a sounding board for you to present your thoughts. This simple concept may allow you to hear what’s holding you back. Your mentor will be able to provide feedback based on thoughts you present as well.

Fears are natural to most of us. Visualize success, leverage positive thoughts, pivot if needed, accept fear to defeat it and engage your mentors. Simple, huh? 😊

Remember, everything Irie!

What tools do you leverage to overcome fear? What have you thought about doing but let fear hold you back? (Respond in the comments section—thanks!)

Photo by Binti Malu on Pexels.com

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

“Named must your fear be before banish it you can”.

(Yoda)

M	T	W	T	F	S	S
			1	2	3	4
5	6	7	8	9	10	11
12	13	14	15	16	17	18
19	20	21	22	23	24	25
26	27	28	29	30

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